


All it takes is a little Doctor Who

by EmrykAlexis



Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: Doctor Who References, F/F, Funny, Idiot Emma
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-02
Updated: 2016-10-02
Packaged: 2018-08-19 00:33:06
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,293
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8182073
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/EmrykAlexis/pseuds/EmrykAlexis
Summary: Regina and Emma are clearly in love with each other. Yet, no one will make a move. What happens when Regina watches the good Doctor?





	

Even before the curse broke everyone with more than a single brain cell could see how badly Regina and Emma had it for each other. Ruby, Katherine, and Snow still couldn't figure out how to push them towards each other without causing a full out war between everyone. As, if they were to confront either party they would vehemently deny it.

Hell, even their son, Henry, could tell how much they loved each other. Even Cora, big bad Cora, could see it. David, being one of the stupidest people ever born, could see it. And while the idiot charmings weren't fond of it, they both knew that nothing but true love could have made their daughter fight as long and hard as she did whenever Regina was concerned.

Who else in their right mind would nearly get themselves killed to save Cora fucking Mills? The most vile, evil, low-down uncaring woman in all of any human history? Emma. And for Emma to do that then she must really, really love Regina. As she certainly didn't do it for Snow. No, she just wanted Regina to be happy, and now that her mother had a heart and was atoning for the major amount of bad she had done she was happier.

It was a slow day at work. Not that they weren't all slow days, but this was particularly slow. So Katherine, Mulan and Snow had stopped in and were playing cards, as they often did, with Ruby as Emma groaned over the massive amounts of paperwork she'd been putting off for months. All in all it was a normal mid-afternoon.

Lunch was being eaten by the wolf as she tried to dominate at Tonk. Unfortunately the woman was losing miserably. Not that it was change. Ruby lost all of the time, it was a several time a week occurrence at the station, and Ruby never lost any better. The clicking of heels alerted everyone to Regina's presence, they all tensed. Eyes widening and teeth crunching together.

All sound ceased to exist as they watched the Mayor round the corner and enter the room like she owned the place. Every pair of eyes were glued to her form. It was never a good sign when she appeared unannounced, generally speaking it ended in a match of raised voices and occasionally singed hair. Ruby's entire table assumed the position, ready to be fucked up the ass.

"Sheriff Swan" Regina stated as she came to a stop before Emma's desk. Her voice boomed, even if in reality it was calm, cool, collected. Eyes dangerous, dark, and pointed. So, basically normal where it concerned Emma. The blonde glanced up at her, green eyes taking in her form on the way up.

Despite the clear love she held for her blonde counterpart you could never be sure if she wanted to grab Emma and fuck her against the nearest surface, have Emma grab her and fuck her, or just shove so many fireballs down the saviors throat that she burned from the inside out. Ruby couldn't wait for them to have sex, so she could hear all about it.

"Mayor Mills" Was the response the blonde gave. Her own eyes a combination of soft and hard. Playful and serious. Emma wasn't the brightest crayon, and as such, she was never scared of the Mayor. Mostly she wanted to fuck with her, or rather just fuck her.

"So you and me we should get a drink sometime" Stated the older woman as if nothing in the world was odd in that statement. That she hadn't just, essentially, demanded a date from the sheriff. Eyes ate in the seen with shocked and confused expressions.

Because, really, it was a commandment. There was no question in her voice, it was nothing more than a pure, unadulterated, statement of fact. The question on everyone's tongues, was what in the hell would Emma's response be, and should they all run for their lives in this very moment.

"Okay" Agreed Emma quickly. Well, that was that. Or so the onlookers thought. They looked back to their game, still confused but not wanting to be caught eavesdropping on this sort of development. All still feared for the safety of their flesh.

"And married" Added Regina. Ruby spit out her coffee, it landing all over Snow's face. Katherine whipped her head around to face the soon to be couple so fast her neck snapped and she thought she was going to lose her head. Snow dropped her cards and her jaw, warm second-hand coffee dripping down her nose and chin.

All of them were pretty sure their Mayor had just ingested far too many drugs, or that they had and were hallucinating this entire scenario. No one just proposed marriage before a first date, especially not a woman like Regina fucking Mills. And their was no way that Emma would agree right?

"Fine" Was spoken with a slightly stupefied, but happy, face. If possible the onlookers jaws would have just fallen off at that point if that had been humanly possible. Who in the hell just accepts a marriage proposal like that? Emma Swan, that's who!

"Did she just seriously? And did she seriously?" Squeaked out Ruby. The other two women nodded dumbly at her. "Fuck. What is even. Are they on drugs, shrooms? Are we on shrooms?" She asked. She received no answer.

"So, can we get all married and stuff on April 22cnd?" Blurted out Emma, totally ignoring everyone except for Regina. The woman across from her lifted one perfect eyebrow, calculating the dates in her mind.

Briefly Ruby wondered if this was all sort of game that the duo had concocted, but as she stared at them she realized this. This was just like them. Deny everything until the last second then race through everything like a goddamn NASCAR champion. She shook her head, Regina wouldn't ever agree to that date. It was too soon.

"As in one week from today?" Regina asked her skeptically. Eagerly the blonde nodded. "That is only a week from now, you do realize that is a exceptionally short engagement" Snow just gaped at the scene happening six feet away.

"Buuuuuuuuuut" Whined out Emma. "It's the day River and the doctor got married! And you know you just stole your proposal from that exact episode." Regina shot the woman the dirtiest glare anyone had ever seen. Emma raised her hands. "Hey, you are the one who proposed before the first date. You are so stuck with me forever"

"Very well dear" Sighed out the annoyed brunette. "I did watch that show to come up with a way to ask you out in the first place, since you refused to make the first move. It just happened to be" Regina struggled to find the right word.

"Addictive baby" Emma interrupted. "Just like me! And If I asked first you'd have fireballed me. Oh! OH! OH! I am so gonna wear a trenchcoat! I will be the tenth doctor and you can be Martha Jo-" Emma stopped speaking and gulped from the new glare Regina was giving her.

"You will wear, at the very least, a nice suit. If I do not personally approve of one of the three choices you are allowed to bring before me I will allow your mother to choose your wedding dress. Understood?" Barked the woman.

"Yes Mam!" Emma chirped. Snow was not pleased that her choice of dress would be a threat, although everyone else at the table snickered at the mere thought of their savior dressed in a far to dressy and glittery monstrosity that their former Queen, would no doubt, make her wear.

"Good. Now. I expect you for dinner at six, on the dot. Do not be late" With that the woman turned and began to walk away. The conversation ended. How in the hell was this going on? Everyone was sure they were insane, the entire scenario was just too bizarre.

"Hey! Wait. Are we gonna." Snow paled as her daughter made motions with her hands. Wincing at the images not hitting her brain. "Cuz I can so send Henry to Snows for the night"

"You can wait a single week dear, you are the one who wanted such a short engagement after all" Said the woman with a smirk that made sinful look like a monk. These women were just. No words could describe them accurately.

While the female half of the not so charming couple's mind was now racing between horrifying images of her daughter and arch nemesis in sexual acts and how on earth the two could manage to plan an entire wedding in a single week. Ruby almost wanted to take bets on whether her head would explode or not.

"Well, can I get a kiss then?" Asked Emma. Her voice full of hope and inundo, a feat Ruby could only hope she could reach someday. Until that moment she hadn't known it was possible to have that sort of voice.

Then she didn't realize that apparently the Evil Queen turned bomb hard ass mayor was a secret Doctor Who fanatic. Who, so desperate to ask the local Sheriff out had to binge watch to find a suitable way to ask someone out, or, in her case, marry them before even the first date. So, Ruby, not to mention the other onlookers, basically felt they needed to go back to school to learn the ways of the all so mystical woman.

"A kiss? I am not so sure you are deserving. You wanted to dress me as Martha Jones. Everyone knows that Rose was, by far, the best companion." At this Mulan looked ready to jump in and defend Martha, but thought better of it considering who her opponent would be.

"OMG THEN I CAN BE JACK FOR THE WEDDING" Screeched the blond. "Because I am super sexy! And it'll be" Regina turned around and pursed her lips. "or I won't dress as jack. Nope. No way. Not at all"

"You have two choices for attire left, choose wisely Swan" Warned the woman. Actually, warn wasn't accurate. No. Regina fucking Mills had used her Evil Queen voice and commanded her fiance to choose wisely.

At this point Snow had no clue what was going on, had a migraine and wouldn't have been surprised is Ares and Xena showed up having a battle in front of her very eyes, the look on her face was comical and Kathryn and Mulan couldn't help but laugh quietly.

"Isn't it weird you've gone from denying your love for each to getting married a week from now, without even a date first?" Snow asked, having finally found her voice as she wiped off now cold sticky coffee from her face. Though she wished it was that easy to rid herself of the mental images plaguing her.

"Nah. It's just us." Shrugged Emma. "i love her, she loves me. Now we can admit it We shall be wed. Have a ton of kids. and since i'm the dude. Well the little magical babies we will have will be Swans" Emma said with excitement.

"Excuse you?" Regina asked as she put her hands back on her hips. Mulan and Kathryn both took sharp intakes of breath, wondering if somehow Emma would be roasted alive before even the first kiss at this point, because their Mayor looked mighty pissed off.

"Well yeah. The man person gets their name at the end, and the wife person is the boss and makes all the rules and controls everything." Was said matter of fact like. Regina clicked her tongue and raised her brow again.

"I suppose I can live with that" Then she walked away. Looking no different than she had when she decided to waltz in. Like she hadn't just proposed marriage, and settled on a wedding date in less than ten minutes. Regina was one fierce fucking woman.

All the card playing quad could do was stare. The mayor had come in. Demanded a date, demanded a marriage. Both which Emma readily agreed to. Then they had managed to settle the date, argue over attire, decide they wanted more children, conclude whose last name they'd use, and decide who was the boss in the relationship in a matter of ten fucking minutes. With an audience.

"What in the name of earth just happened, are we sure Granny didn't sneak shrooms onto our burgers? Because. This. This makes no fucking sense! Like. She. Then She. But she. And yes?" A very confused Ruby sputtered as she made wild hand motions.

The sheriff let out a small chuckle as she leaned back in her chair, placing her hands on her head. A very satisfied, and dopey, grin on her face. Snow blinked at the scene. This was. Her daughter really was an idiot. She fully blamed David for her intellectual ineptitude.

"I just became the lucki" A scream cut off her sentence as the idiot, in all her glory, had leaned just a little too far back and had ended up splattered across the floor. "Luckiest person on earth" She finished before she began to rub her aching head. "Think she'll allow swim trunks?"

At that all Snow could do was slam her head into the table and conclude that her husband needed to have a vasectomy. For as much as she truly loved her daughter, the woman was the second biggest moron she'd ever met. The only sadder truth was she had willingly married the only person more moronic than her daughter in any universe. Her final thought before going back to the card game was that she hoped her grandchildren got their brains from Regina.

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you enjoyed it. I wrote it, well, a really long time ago. Just never posted. As always please let me know any thoughts you might have.


End file.
